A week ago today I had my last of 33 radiation treatments! I packed up my hotel room, rang the bell, and came home. When I received the call from a doctor telling me I had cancer I was sitting in the living room of friends in Albania. God had sent me there, and God timed that call. That was Friday, July 27, 2018. On Friday, April 5, 2019 I finished n-i-n-e long, hard months of treatments in the morning, and confirmed my tickets back to Albania that afternoon.

I will have breast conservation surgey with sentinel node biopsy and possible axillary lymph node dissection on Tuesday. The cancer has responded so well to the chemotherapy that it cannot be felt, only seen through imaging. That ole Red Devil…it reminds me of Romans 8:28.

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

God took a poison, a toxin and made it good. God took a disease, and healed. Years ago God took me, a sinner, forgave, and started calling me according to His purpose.

Friday I go in for the fourth round of this particular chemotherapy cocktail, then I have four rounds of another kind before surgery and then five weeks of radiation. I’m not going to sugar coat this, it’s been tough, tougher than I thought it would be. It’s the hardest physical challenge I’ve had in my life.

Everything I read tells me that the chemo effects everyone differently. They call them side effects but theres no “side” to it. They are everywhere - your mouth erupts in painful sores, your bones ache as if they are healing from breaks, taste buds disappear, your digestive track no longer knows how to digest so it either works too fast or too slow causing painful other problems, hair follicles just jump ship and go on strike until the game is over,

I read every single word of love and encouragement written to me. I treasure them and they make me smile and warm my heart. Unfortunately, I think I seldom respond to those words with a thank you. Some times it’s because I see the notification in a moment of exhaustion. Some times the text comes through as my head is pounding. Some times I grab a card from the mailbox or hear the chime of an email when I feel like “me” and am up to my ears with the sweet tasks of being mom. I may not respond, but really and truly I read them all and am overwhelmed in gratitude for being so blessed by so many praying for me.

Thursday morning as I was having the biopsy on my left breast. I was talking with God and my mind went to Joshua. This seemed strange to me because I’m currently reading in Samuel and then of course I’m a little obsessed with Job right now. I’m not Job but I can definitely relate on certain levels with him. But anyways I started thinking about how Joshua had to walk around Jericho seven times and why? I mean we know God told him to, so he just had to obey but why? What was the bigger purpose? The bigger picture?

In December of 2017 I weighed than I had at the end of any of my five pregnancy's. The year had been heavy. I ran fast and hard the first few years after Mike died - Rebuilding Hanco Exterminating, moving the bookstore across the street, seeing Seanan through heart surgery, and getting my house in order. Then came that last year. What now? Everything seemed to be falling into place yet he still was missing. Still gone. I crawled under the wing of the Lord and hibernated. I needed rest. I needed to hide for a while. As 2017 came to a close I felt God nudging me. He had sheltered me during my rest but now it was time to climb on top of that wing again and soar with Him.

Geographically it's beautiful. Mountains rest behind fields of wild, fruits of every kind grow profoundly in every direction, and the waters from sea to ponds and rivers hide within the landscape.

Historically it is rich. Form ancient amphitheaters to medieval castles and towers to the fall of a communistic rule in the 1990's it leaves no decade dull for the books. 

It's real treasure though is its people. They have a strong tradition of family and community not often found in today. They live close, they mourn together, and they celebrate together, often for days.